Female Conversation

This weekend was eventful. My sister, Tanya, threw a baby shower for Christi which meant a weekend visit from friends and family. The first to arrive were Stacy, Kristi, and Amanda. These girls, all married to my buddies in Dallas, have adopted Christi.

Friday evening I joined the four girls for dinner. As the only male at the table I was privy to a completely different form of communication. The priority of dinner was clearly not eating. Words poured out of all four females at a machine gun pace. No pause long enough for a breath, no topic off limits. They discussed waxing, shaving, polishing, buffing, curling, cracking, and bleeding. Next, and in this order, were: driving, television, pediatricians, dogs, movies, breasts, drinking, cats, insurance, and a little sports. The only pause was when the waiter introduced himself and took our drink order. I’ve never been happier to see a gay man in my life. I was able to find a TV in the distance showing a baseball game to occupy my mind instead of trying to keep up with the conversation.

Forced to try to regain some of my manhood, the following morning I drove downtown and bought a new shotgun. I gathered up my nephews and a friend to shoot a little skeet while the girls went to the shower. A shotgun range made for a quiet afternoon compared to the previous evenings dinner. We met up at my sister house shortly after 4pm. Christi had a wonderful time at the shower and received more gifts than our house would hold. A good start to the weekend.