Armenian Money Train

Sorry for the obscure reference in the title but for those of you who watch “The Shield”, you will know what I mean when I say I feel like we just robbed the Armenian Money Train. I’ll explain…

As chronicled in this blog, for the past 3 years, Christi and I have wanted nothing more than to make a baby. We spent countless hours in doctor’s offices, traveled to Houston to meet with fertility specialists, exhausted our savings with in-vitro, and cried ourselves to sleep a couple of times in the process. In the end, it was all worth it.

Christi’s completed 31 of the 38 weeks and doing a wonderful job of growing our children. We are completely ready for our boys to come. It’s now up to them to tell us when they are ready. The last couple of weeks have been really quiet. Buying clothes here and toys there occupies our time.

It looked as though my boys inherited my inability to remember which holiday is in May. Monday may have been Memorial Day but the boys sure thought it was Labor Day! At 8pm, Christi reluctantly mentioned that she thought she had a cramp… or a contraction. What? Then she mentioned another… 6 minutes later… another. SHIT! She’s in labor. Ok… remember your training Dad. Breathe, drink water, lot’s of water… “Someone boil some water and get me some hot towels!” We have two helpless children coming. Our family is going to start right now. Sleepless nights, little league, report cards, drivers ed… AHHHH!

After a tense two hours the contractions subsided. We ordered a pizza and ate in complete silence.

Holy crap… what have we done?

April Showers

April was an eventful month. Christi’s baby shower was on the 21st followed by a baby shower for my nephew and his wife on the 22nd. With lots of preparation leading up to the parties, it seemed like April was full of panic to get ready for the big weekend. We were very fortunate to have the Dallas girls come down to Austin to lend a hand. Thanks to a lot of planning and a little luck...both parties were a hit.

I was excited about the opportunity to relax the last weekend of the month. Saturday and Sunday made an excellent cap to the month. Saturday… NFL Draft Day would mean an 8-hour marathon of college highlights and draft picks. Sunday… breakfast downtown, a nap, and the Sopranos. I was looking forward to a May where Christi’s energy levels necessitated more couch-bound weekends.

Yesterday, we visited Dr. Seeker to get a black-and-white view of the boys. The sonograms proved that everyone was healthy and growing rapidly. We were assured that, should the boys be born today, they would have 100% chance of survival... a relief. That was when I made a mistake that would cost me my planned Spring Couch-O-Thon. I made mention to Christi that we had only ten more weeks of coasting until the babies arrived. Like Rosie O'Donnell hearing that someone ate the last donut, I saw a look of horror pass over her face. The following rant ensued: “10 WEEKS! We only have 10 weeks? No, that can’t be right! 1,2…4…8…10 – Holy SHIT! We have lots of stuff to do to get ready!” As I looked into Christi’s eyes, I could see the reflection of spreadsheets, task lists, and email reminders. There was work to be done.

I immediately felt the remote control getting separation anxiety. I could hear the XBox let out deep, slow-motion wail “NOooooo…” The television couldn’t even look me in the eye. They, and I, knew I had let them all down.